An uninvited Guest

Lights will guide you home, ignite your bones, And I, will fix you.
Says my alter ego after each anxiety attack it has had.
After all the paralyzing and the damage,
 You can manage to keep me in place
My dear depression and anxiety, you,
You have been the most loyal friend,
Never leaving me,
Always having my back,
Always having the whole of me.
So here I am, lending a hand forward
To befriend you,
By writing to you.
It’s kind of a love poem you see,
To the one thing that devastates me the most.
Words penned here are sweet poison,
Soothe yourself and break yourself down you,
Coz the words are bloody broken to pay you your loyalty.
You are my one passionate lover I’ve observed,
So adamant, so prickling, once you set your mind
You barely leave me alive,
In that moment I beg for anything,
Some water, some air please, anything but you?
Stop choking me; don’t make me a slave,
But you, my dear you are so much more grounded,
Denying to leave.
I can sense you wrapping your arms around me
Hugging gently and then fierce fully all of a sudden.
You be like a black serpent sitting quietly in the back,
You don’t wait for timing at times,
Crawl through my mind at one time and bite me the other.
So you know, I can never really be ready
To face you, to defend myself, to let you bite
And then when you’re done,
You leave me with ooze,
I feel like I have successfully surpassed a deadly storm,
The most poisonous venom,
And wait for another,
Hoping that this time, the peace would last
Just a little longer.
When you come for me the next time,
I will make sure to let you in,
Stay with me,
I shall stab you,
Bleed you to death,
When, I am done.
Till then, keep knocking my door,
I (you) will serve you (me), brutally. 

If only thoughts were visible

I wonder what this world would look like,
If only thoughts were visible.
Writers today would be painters then,
Conquering the world with paintings.
While backstabbers would be killers,
Impairing and piercing hearts,
by knives thrusting.
Dogs would be the masters,
Their loyalty would be seen.
And masters would be their slaves,
Their insensitivity would be unseen.
People would get closer,
Leaving no notions hidden.
While “hypocrites” would be farther,
Revealing what’s within.
Honesty would be obvious,
And opinions be crystal clear.
Heartbreaks would be visual
And peace would perhaps be a blank space,
Easily available,
yet difficult to find.
While introspection would be a scribbling,
The right one struggling to come through from the thoughts unrefined.
What would thoughts be ?
It could’ve been known only if they were visible.


A mind that kept on chanting the words of rationality,
Didn’t quite know it would fall in the pit of this silly sanctity.
A tender heart that never knew how to beat at its highest pace,
On thinking about you, started running like a horse in a race.
A mouth that didn’t know how to explain the unexplainable,
Got guts and words to say the plausible.
Fingers that just used to search up stuff on google,
Started striving to  those layers of your wizardry mind to fumble.
Things are the same as they were, words mean the same as they did,
It’s just that, an acquainted meaning and sound has been attached to anything that I feed.
A strong illusion and desire for things to last,
Will only leave your thoughts in aghast.
Little did you know, this girl had started dreaming about a journey with you,
A  soul ,clumsy and callous , innocent but blue.
You’re someone out of my league, that’s what I always anticipated,
With fleeting time and knowing  you’re one of my kind, my presages were again mended.
I could feel you getting closer to my every ounce,
Gradually at first, and then all at once.
But was it so easy for us to get along?
You don’t know my roots, and where I belong,
A society so conservative, and a family so supportive,
Who I decided to fight with, pulling up my socks.
My thoughts threatened to abandon me on one side,
They were ready to set me free on the other.
I was still shackled in the chains of love,
Love which wasn’t yours, but the one that I had for my folks’,
I couldn’t hurt them, just to be with you.
We could have been perfect for each other,
My fingers could have perfectly fit in between yours,
Our consonance could have been a miracle,
Which the world would  have watched and allured,
But perhaps we were ‘nt meant to be a cliche, but just something more.
I’m tired of hurting and drifting us away,
Please loosen the grip , let it sway,
Let it go and let it drift away.
I’m saying the cliché,
But please don’t get pissed.
You’re a gem, but I can’t love you for the same.
I’m just an ordinary bee amongst the masses,
Whose priorities change as the time passes.
You’ll find someone who’s a better fit for you
I’m shaggy and rugged,
Certainly not the one for you.
You had always been a mind sweeper for me,
A soul, so pure and innocent to be.

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